Tell Your Best Joke
- Thread starter Stizzla
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Capt_Ed
Crew Member
For God sakes Yes, take me now before Trudope and his merry band of mush heads get another term
IronNoggin
Well-Known Member
IronNoggin
Well-Known Member
Sotally Tober
Well-Known Member
Stizzla
Crew Member
True story:
I was with my wife like 10 years ago at a salad bar and there was a 350lb lady loading her plate up with cheese, bacon and croutons etc. Just all stuff that got her there. She also had one small piece of broccoli on the side. Her phone rang and she answered “what’s up girl?… just gettin’ my veggies!”
wifey and I still quote that to this day.
Sotally Tober
Well-Known Member
RiverBoy
Well-Known Member
that’s my wife you jerk!
SpringFever2359
Well-Known Member
Sotally Tober
Well-Known Member
IronNoggin
Well-Known Member
Nine Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older
#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
#8 Life is sexually transmitted.
#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
#2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today might burn your butt tomorrow.
#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
#8 Life is sexually transmitted.
#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
#2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today might burn your butt tomorrow.
IronNoggin
Well-Known Member
scott craven
Well-Known Member
No that is a petrified dinosaur egg for sure !
Sharphooks
Well-Known Member
Sorry, I don’t have a dog in this fight but that’s a stone, not a rock. Each to their own, I guess.... but it’s a stone.
And while we’re at it.... this is a sofa. I’ve heard it incorrectly referred to as a couch. The term "couch" is believed to have come from the French word "couche," which is used to describe "a piece of furniture with no arms.....used for lying”
So, when you hear someone say, oh, look, a couch!, you’ll know they’re lying, and you’ll understand right away why it’s called a sofa.
And while we’re at it.... this is a sofa. I’ve heard it incorrectly referred to as a couch. The term "couch" is believed to have come from the French word "couche," which is used to describe "a piece of furniture with no arms.....used for lying”
So, when you hear someone say, oh, look, a couch!, you’ll know they’re lying, and you’ll understand right away why it’s called a sofa.
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