Tell Your Best Joke

Two buddies, Dave and Herb, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly
Dave throws up all over himself. "Oh, no...My wife is going to kill me!"
Herb says, "Don't worry, pal... Just tuck a twenty in your top pocket and
tell your wife that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollarsfor
... the dry cleaning bill."
So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker.
Eventually Dave stumbles home and his wife starts to give him a bad
time. "You reek of alcohol and you've puked all over yourself! My God,
you're disgusting!"
Speaking very carefully so as not to slur his words, Dave says,
"Nowainaminit, I can e'splain everythin. Itsh snot wha jewthink. I only
had a cupla drrrinks. But thiss other guy got ssick on me...he had one too
many and he juss koudin hold hizz liquor. He said hes was verrry sorry an'
gave me twennie bucks for the cleaning bill!"
His wife looks in the top pocket and says, "But this is forty Bucks..."
"Oh, yeah... I almos' fergot, he shhhit in my pants, too."
 
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