New Bellringer Wanted

A small zoo in Wheeling, West Virginia obtained a very rare species of gorilla.


Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.

Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem... The gorilla

was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee
Walton, a good ol' redneck boy and part-time worker responsible for


cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little

common sense but he possessed an ample tool and a reputation of being

able to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was
approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the
gorilla for $500.00?

Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the
matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would
accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

"First thing", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the
lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever'
t-shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this.

"Third", he said, "you can't never tell nobody 'bout this." The
keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "If there is ever any children, I want them


raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

"And last thing," Bobby Lee said, "I'm gonna need about another week to
come up with the $500.00."
 
Remember the 7 qualities for the perfect girlfriend... Beautiful, Intelligent, Gentle, Thoughtful, Innocent, Trustworthy, Sensible.

Or in other words........... B.I.G.T.I.T.S.
 
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