Joke of the Day

[sammyslabber]

The rain was pouring and there was a big puddle in front of the pub.

A ragged old man was standing there with a rod and hanging a string into the puddle.
A tipsy- looking, curious gentleman came over to him and asked what he was doing.

'Fishing,' the old man said simply.

'Poor old fool,' the gentleman thought and he invited the ragged old man to a drink in the pub.

As he felt he should start some conversation while they were sipping their whisky, the gentleman asked, ‘And how many have you caught?'

'You're the eighth,' the old man answered.

---

​

 

[fogged in]

Hey Sammey
was talking with your wife the other day....she said you were the "MODEL" husband
wow...I thought.
Made me a little jealous though, until I looked up the word "MODEL" in the dictionary.
"MODEL" ....SMALL IMITATION OF THE REAL THING.....

 

[banger17]

Hey Sammey
was talking with your wife the other day....she said you were the "MODEL" husband
wow...I thought.
Made me a little jealous though, until I looked up the word "MODEL" in the dictionary.
"MODEL" ....SMALL IMITATION OF THE REAL THING.....

haha good call!

 

[dougthefisher]

How did the blond try to kill the worm?

 

[Lipripper]

Buried it alive?

 

[sammyslabber]

sammy an 'e'

 

[Califbill]

There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the
Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.
Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for
her first day promptly at 8:00 am.
The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.
The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new
Employee.
He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line
is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the
2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is
so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor
and they're really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of
Tickle Me Elmo's.
She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.
The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric,
wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little
package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes
of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .
'I'm sorry,' he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, 'but
I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday...'
'Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.

 

[sammyslabber]